Every year, it’s the same story. I promise myself I’ll lose weight, start eating better, and make smarter food choices . I imagine getting out for a brisk walk after work, cooking more wholesome meals, and feeling energized and confident. But after a month or so, my best intentions fizzle out. The walk never happens because my knees ache (they have been for quite some time) or I become too busy. My kids need help with homework, my work runs late, and I find I’m short on time and energy. Before I know it, the big goals I set have left me feeling frustrated and defeated.

If this sounds all too familiar, you’re not alone. When we fail to achieve our resolutions time and time again, it’s often because the goals we set are just too ambitious, vague, or unrealistic. They demand dramatic changes overnight, without acknowledging our day-to-day realities. Maybe we need to go back to the drawing board and take a more strategic approach.

Rethinking How We Set Goals

We often talk about setting “SMART” goals—those that are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. Let’s say your aim is to “lose some weight.” It’s too vague. Instead, try “I want to lose 5 pounds in 8 weeks by walking 15 minutes three times a week for the first two weeks, then 30 minutes three times a week from week three onward.” This way, you know precisely what success looks like, how you’re going to measure it, and when you need to get started. There’s no room for confusion or excuses—it’s all laid out.

Starting Small and Building On Success

Instead of pledging to lose 15 pounds in two months straight away, break it down into smaller steps. Start by fitting in that 15-minute walk just three times a week. Once that’s comfortable, bump it up to 30 minutes. Before you know it, you’re moving more and feeling more confident. Take it step-by-step, and celebrate each small victory along the way.

Systems Over Goals

It’s tempting to focus on the end result—dropping a dress size or hitting a number on the scale. But consider shifting your mindset from grand goals to supportive systems. A system might be your consistent routine of morning stretches or your regular bedtime that ensures you sleep by 10 p.m. every weeknight. Systems create habits that run on autopilot, making it easier to maintain health without dramatic, short-lived efforts.

We often celebrate someone who lost 20 pounds after being out of shape, but rarely acknowledge the person who never got overweight in the first place because they stuck to a disciplined, moderate exercise routine. As a society, we admire the comeback story—someone who overcame a setback—more than the person who avoided the setback by building a steady, sustainable lifestyle. But you can choose to be the steady one. Systems foster long-term health, not just short-lived triumphs.

Seize the Moment, Every Day

Achieving your goals means making the most of the time you have. Ask yourself: Did I really have no time to work out today? Or did I miss opportunities—like a quick walk during my lunch break—simply because I didn’t plan to seize them? By deciding in advance when and where you’ll take action (e.g., “If it’s Monday, Wednesday, or Friday, I’ll work out for 30 minutes before breakfast”), you create mental cues that help you act. Studies show that this kind of planning can increase your success rate by roughly 300%.

Track Your Progress Honestly

Don’t guess how you’re doing—check regularly. Whether that’s weighing yourself weekly, logging how many walks you took, or noting how many fruits and veggies you ate, honest self-monitoring allows you to make course corrections before things go off track.

Be a Realistic Optimist

Believe you can achieve your goal, but don’t assume it’ll be easy. Sustainable change takes time, planning, effort, and persistence. If you’re prepared for the challenges, you won’t be blindsided when they show up. Embrace difficulty as part of the journey, not a sign you’ve failed.

Focus on Getting Better, Not Being Perfect

Forget the idea that your abilities or health are fixed. You can get stronger, fitter, and healthier through practice and patience. Aim to improve your habits rather than prove yourself. Welcome setbacks as learning experiences rather than catastrophes.

Develop Grit and Willpower

Grit keeps you going when the going gets tough. Consider it a long-term commitment to yourself. Similarly, willpower is like a muscle—the more you use it (without overstraining), the stronger it gets. Start with small challenges: skip the sugary snack once a day and reach for a piece of fruit instead, or stand up straight whenever you catch yourself slouching. Over time, these small acts of self-control add up, making you more resilient.

Don’t Make It Harder Than It Has to Be

If you’re trying to eat healthier, don’t fill your kitchen with tempting junk food. If you’re building a workout habit, don’t schedule your sessions at impossible times. Be honest with yourself about where you struggle and set yourself up for success by removing unnecessary temptations and hurdles

Plan What You Will Do, Not What You Won’t

Rather than saying “I won’t snack on crisps in the evening,” say, “If I fancy a snack, I’ll have a handful of almonds or some carrot sticks.” We know that trying not to think about something makes it all the more tempting. Replace bad habits with better ones, rather than focusing on what you’re trying to avoid.

Embrace the Journey

The bottom line: it’s okay to not be perfect. If you’ve set ambitious resolutions before and not stuck with them, remember that you’re in good company. The key is to learn from those experiences, create more achievable goals and systems, and be kind to yourself along the way.

Set goals that are specific, realistic, and sustainable. Aim to build habits that last longer than a few weeks in January. Appreciate the small victories and view challenges as part of the journey rather than signs of failure. When you do that, you’ll find yourself not just chasing a healthier life, but truly living it day by day.

So let’s raise a cuppa to healthier habits, clearer plans, and a happier, fitter version of you and me—one step, one smart choice, one little system at a time.